EFTA01118712.pdf

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Aodrass illar Omp Caia40:04eNAVOlieltgru thcp44 kanKkayn o.,....iianoteourissamo 1 Cargo Artrali070, PelhOSISow ee pond a •Inittrimi Lein I tra. )f ri St.,. l L 2tP 'AA:ti() 7 Payment Beim _ ISMFO4h APS N•Cred•CIN PM %in °It= iiiIIV auai11 1_I 2: 1 Reticien: 3E1 TrtedPary. 4114Cect:Cold 5r 8u7s7F17,cc ii ToielPacikan iniViect* L 8001 602 1368 .set.10e4tIZO6tn.t p ay-4e r nee toonortimlos, 0•• Iliii•Pm41341•01(01-21/i4O-PPOIMPUS• 612 EFTA01118712  ay 13, 2012 Dear Jeff, You may not remember me, I met you at your mother's funeral. Paula and my mother, Reba were very close friends and walking buddies for many, many years at Golden Lakes. My name is Laiya, though your mother would have referred to me as Anita ( the name my parents used). I am writing to you to ask you for help. It seems very presumptuous to me to do this and yet, why not....If you can't or don't want to ....all I have lost is a little time.....If you can help me, and decide to do so...I would be very grateful. Jeff, the past ten years of my life have been very challenging, and though I have met my challenges ...it has left my personal and professional life in chaos on almost every level. In 2001, I left my stable personal and professional life in Santa Fe to care for my parents. (I was not able to move them to Santa Fe, because the difference in altitude would have killed my father in a matter of weeks.) Unfortunately I had no family support, making it that much more difficult. Both of my parents died in 2005, leaving me depleted on every level. There was nothing left of their estate. And I was left with a wall of personal debts, exhausted and needing to heal my body and my life. By then I was in Maine. After my mother passed away, I moved there with my father. Florida was never a place I wanted to live. He died shortly after we arrived. I knew almost no one ...and so my healing was a very slow and lonely process. In the Spring of 2006, my daughter gave birth to a son...the product of an abusive, alcoholic/drug relationship. She has a 20 year history of substance abuse and all of the fringe benefits that come with that life style. She arrived in July of that year with the baby, unable to take care of him or herself. I did what I could to keep a roof over our heads in hopes that my daughter would begin to heal, now that she was a mother. It never happened and the few times I tried a tough love stance....the baby's safety was serious compromised. At this point, I am in the final stages of gaining permanent custody of my grandson. He has been living with me full time since November of last year. EFTA01118713  2 My daughter is nearby and not taking the best care of herself nor showing any signs that she is interested in being responsibility for Isaac. Though I think that she might be sober. It is very sad....she is a very bright and creative woman. The trauma and wounds she will have to manage are significant even if she is sober, her resources are very limited....at best it will be a long road to rebuild her life. Her interest and ability to be a responsible is marginal and the damage is significant. Over the six years, my financial situation went from bad to worse and now my credit is trashed and I am driving a 1996 Accord with almost 300,000 miles on it. As if this saga is not dramatic enough, last Spring I was diagnosed with a malignant tumor in my bladder. The tumor has since been removed and my challenges are to find a way to heal my body....which I think I just might be managing. It was on my healing journey, that I ended up in Florida last summer. And weirdly enough in Golden Lakes at a sublet( very strange to be there without our parents and their community). It was there that I met a women who had been friends with our mothers(one of the few remaining residents of that Golden Lakes generation). She told me of your plight....I am sorry....amazing the dramas that have become part of our lives. Who would have ever thought.. 999" Maybe because of the extreme closeness our mothers shared, or my closeness to your mom both over the years when I would walk with them or when I was there taking care of my parents. I don't know, but after I got back to Maine, I looked you up on the internet. I needed to know more. I am sorry if that seems invasive. It was not with any kind of malice. I would remember some the stories. Your mother's concerns for you that I heard directly or through my mom. I noticed how we both were drawn to some of the same places ....I lived in Santa Fe, spent time in the Islands. And though I enjoyed NYC, it was from a safe distance ....Philly was my hometown.. Very different lifestyles, but locale was the same.. It was somewhere in my wandering, that I realized that maybe you would be able to help....at least from the stories, it seems that you have been very generous with your wealth...and have had the good fortune to accumulate rather abundant resources. I am grateful for this past year, there has been much healing. Physically, I am improving, my grandson is safe and with me and has healed considerably over this winter. There was significant trauma from the chaos. For both of us, actually. Until recently, we have been together almost 2417 except for a few EFTA01118714  3 hours here and there. With my clinical background, I decided to work through the abandonment issues, rather than be haunted by them for years to come. My instincts were right. Isaac actually started to sleep in his own bed this week. And I have been able to start working again. Though it is slow in coming, it is coming. However, the huge wall of debris that has been left in the wake of these years is not one I will be able to manage with any kind of grace. I have always been very independent, however, I am learning to ask for help...even from virtual strangers. Jeff, I have been on food stamps, unemployment...which might be OK for some people, but not for me. It is not a life style that enables me to flourish. It is frustrating that caring for my family has brought me to this place. But at least I have survived and now I can rebuild. I am a fighter and do not give up. But I need help. I want an opportunity to recreate my professional self. When most of my friends are heading to retirement, I need to get back to work, so I can raise this boy and give him a real chance at success in his life. Jeff, I am a professional woman. I have masters plus and worked for many years as a family therapist, successful enough to keep my daughter in private school as a single parent. I was widowed when she was a baby. Over the years, my work has evolved into that of a healer using many different modalities. As I have matured, I realize that my gifts have been with me since I was little. I work on a different side of the scientific continuum than what seems to have attracted your attention. But one that is also very effective in accessing the mysteries of life. I am actually looking forward to getting back to work and seeing what I have learned and how these skills matured after all that I have experienced. However, if I can not quell that distractions of dealing with the stressors that have been left in the quake of these past ten years....I will be extremely limited at best. I would love to say I could help you in return and though I have helped many people heal their lives. You have not asked and I would not be so bold as to presume that you need me to do anything. So, that leaves me with asking if you could please consider helping us/me. I need to get our lives stabilized, a chance to catch my breath. I have always been very good at figuring out what I need to do to succeed with the next steps. It seems like a new car and financial resources to drawn from until I can get us EFTA01118715  4 settled into a community. Isaac needs to get on with being a little boy and I need to get back to my work. I do not even know if this letter will find you. I know your address in Florida, but not anywhere else and I do not know which home you may be in. If this letter does get to you. And even if you decide that I am some crazy person who has no right to ask you for help, please have someone in your staff let me know so I know that you have received this and I will not be left wondering... My contact information is Lai a Domsk My email address is . My phone number is =I Thanks, PS. One more thing, when I met you at your mom's funeral, you mentioned to me that it took them six weeks to kill your mother. At the time, I felt that way too. When I would visit your mother in the hospital, either with my mom or by myself, I was very upset at what was happening. Then as the weeks, month and now years have passed, I remembered something your mother said to me a few months before she went into the hospital. It gave me a real sense of peace and a different way to view what had happened. You know I loved your mom. Over the many years, she became friend. I would have never been able to manage caring for my parents as well as I did, if it were not for your mother's loving support. That is why I tried to do as much as I could for her during the weeks she was in the hospital. Jeff, I would be honored to share what I remembered with you, if you wish. Laiya EFTA01118716