EFTA02413222.pdf

To: undisclosed-recipients:[©] From: Sent Thur 6/10/2010 12:55:54 PM Subject Fw: Basic Business Management Course Jonathon E Lyons This Email is for non bussiness Emails only ! From: "Jonathon lyons" Date: Thu, 10 Jun 2010 To: Rep y o: Subject: w: asrc usmess anagement Course Jonathon E _Lyons MOM From: Date: c , un 1 : : 6- 4 Subject: FW: Basic Business Management Course From: Date: Wed, 9 Jun 2010 20:05:57 -0400 Subject: Fwd: FW: Basic Business Management Course EFTA_R1_01475655 EFTA02413222  From: ent: .10 :4 :44 astern laylight ime Subj: Fwd: FW: Basic Business Management Course Forwarded message From: anthony franze Date: Mon. Jun 7. 2010 Subject: FW: Basic Business Management Course To: From: Date: Sun, 6 Jun 2010 14:31:37 -0400 Sub ect: Fwd: Fw: Fwd: Basic Business Mana•ement Course Sent. Subj: Fw: Fwd: Basic Business Management Course Have a great day, Fred EFTA_R1_01475656 EFTA02413223 Subject: Basic Business Management Course Management Course Lesson 1: >A man is getting into the shower just as his >wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell E,A_R1_01475657 EFTA02413224  > rings. >The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and >runs downstairs. >When she opens the door, there stands Bob, >the next-door neighbor. >Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give >you $800 to drop that E,A_R1_01475658 EFTA02413225  towel.' >After thinking for a moment, the woman drops >her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after >a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. >The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes >back upstairs. EFT,1_01475659 EFTA02413226 >When she gets to the bathroom, her husband >asks, 'Who was that?' >'It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she > replies. >'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything >about the $800 he owes me?' >Moral of the story: E,A_R1_01475660 EFTA02413227  >Ifyou share critical information pertaining >to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, > you may be in a position to prevent avoidable > exposure. >Lesson 2: >A priest offered a Nun a lift. >She got in and EFT,1_01475861 EFTA02413228  crossed her legs, forcing her >gown to reveal a leg. >The priest nearly had an accident. >After controlling the car, he stealthily slid >his hand up her leg. >The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' >The priest removed his hand. But, changing EFT,1_01475862 EFTA02413229 >gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. >The nun once again said, 'Father, remember >Psalm 129?' >The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the >flesh is weak.' >Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily >and went on her way. >On his arrival at the EFT,1_01475863 EFTA02413230  church, the priest rushed >to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, > further up, you will find glory.' >Moral of the story: >Ifyou are not well informed in your job, you >might miss a great opportunity. >Lesson 3: EFTA_R1_01475664 EFTA02413231  >A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the > manager are walking to lunch when they find an > antique oil lamp. >They rub it and a Genie comes out. >The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just >one wish.' >'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. EFT,1_01475865 EFTA02413232  >'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, > without a care in the world.' >Puff! She's gone. >'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep.. 'I >want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal >masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and >the love of my life.' E,A_R1_01475666 EFTA02413233  >Puff! He's gone. >'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager. >The manager says, 'I want those two back in >the office after >lunch.' >Moral of the story: >Always let your boss have the first say. >Lesson 4 >An eagle was sitting EFT,1_01475867 EFTA02413234  on a tree resting, doing > nothing. >A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, >'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?' >The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.' >So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the >eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox E,A_R1_01475668 EFTA02413235  appeared, >jumped on the rabbit and ate it. >Moral of the story: >To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be > sitting very, very high up.. >Lesson 5 >A turkey was chatting with a bull. >'I would love to be EFT,1_01475869 EFTA02413236  able to get to the top >of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't >got the energy.' >'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' > replied the bull. They're packed with > nutrients.' >The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found >it actually gave him EFT,1_01475670 EFTA02413237  enough strength to reach >the lowest branch of the tree. >The next day, after eating some more dung, >he reached the second branch. >Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was >proudly perched at the top of the tree. >He was promptly E,A_R1_01475671 EFTA02413238  spotted by a farmer, who shot >him out of the tree. >Moral of the story: >Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it >won't keep you there.. >Lesson 6 >A little bird was flying south for the winter. >It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the EFT,1_01475672 EFTA02413239  > ground into a large field. >While he was lying there, a cow came by and >dropped some dung on him.. >As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.. >The dung was actually thawing him EFT,1_01475673 EFTA02413240  out! >He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began >to sing for joy. >A passing cat heard the bird singing and came >to investigate. >Following the sound, the cat discovered the >bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly EFT,1_01475674 EFTA02413241 >dug him out and ate him. >Morals of the story: >(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your > enemy. >(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit iS > your >friend. >(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best >to keep >your mouth shut! EFTA_R1_01475675 EFTA02413242  >THUS ENDS THE FIVE MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE >Send this to at > least five > bright, funny people you know and make their day >! The New Bo, think 9 to 5 ie... idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hobnail. G ,,us. y EFT,1_01475676 EFTA02413243 The New Busy think 9 to 5 is a cute idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hotmail. Get busy. EFTA_R1_01475677 EFTA02413244